Mother's Day: Capturing Memories

While spending an absurd amount of time searching for a decent picture of myself to post with this article, I came to a couple of realizations. First, I have at least a dozen huge photo albums dating from 1996 to 2006 in which there are minimal pictures of me. Tons of kid pictures. Plenty of shots of the grandparents with tiny babies in their arms. Super cute shots of the kids with their aunts and uncles. Each year chronicled with Dad and three kids smiling happily on Easter, Christmas, or at the 4th of July. One main person is missing . . . Mom! This leads me to believe that I must have taken most all of these pictures or I was hiding out somewhere. 

Second, the pictures I did find of myself show me as a true Mom in action. I’m sure you know the pictures. For the photos of the darling baby years, Mom is looking half-asleep, dressed in mismatched clothing (if completely dressed at all) with a half-smile and haggard look on her face. I’m wearing a spit-cloth tossed casually over my shoulder awaiting that next burp. My hair isn’t brushed, I can tell I haven’t showered in a couple of days, and I’m definitely carrying around too many of those extra post-pregnancy pounds.

Fast forward a year. Now the first baby is toddling around while I’m also toddling around heavily pregnant with baby number two. At this point I think I was probably avoiding the camera altogether, hence the lack of pictures. Mom still looks exhausted but smiling happily for the camera with her eyes closed.

A few years later that camera captures me as a blur of motion as I chase after two very active kids. In the few pictures I could find, I’m usually wearing my uniform of jeans, a t-shirt, and sneakers pushing a stroller around The Mall in Washington, DC, in front of the panda cage with my monkeys at the National Zoo, or at a backyard BBQ wearing the children’s BBQ all over my shirt. My favorite pictures of me from this era of my life are those of me asleep in the sun on boats. (No, not lounging in the sun in my bathing suit. I wish!) These shots are of me stealing a quick nap while someone else watched the kids who are pictured wildly running around the boat.

Then that third bundle of joy finally arrives. Now looking back on these pictures of a blob-like me after four months on bed-rest, I’m wondering why I ever let anyone take a picture of me in that state and why I bothered to put these pictures in an album instead of destroying them completely! That baby-to-preschooler picture cycle starts up again with a few more snapshots of me looking a bit more relaxed, cleaner, and much fitter as that third baby grows up. 

But now I’ve run out of picture albums because all of those kid pictures are now housed on my hard-drive, waiting to be printed and placed in an album. Years worth of pictures of kids with their friends, playing sports, and occasionally with their Mom. 

This Mother’s Day, do Mom a favor. Take that camera away from her and put Mom in front of the lens instead of behind it. Take pictures of your beautiful mothers, print off the best pictures, and frame them for her.  Lavish Mom with love not only on this Mother’s Day but every day. 

Puerto Rican Escape

If you’ve never been to Puerto Rico, you are missing out! A short plane ride from Miami lands you in the lush tropical US territory of Puerto Rico. But this was no ordinary vacation to Puerto Rico. This involved months of planning and coordinating travel plans with 3 other couples all of whom are my neighbors . . . I must admit that I hoped that we all would get along as well on vacation as we did back home on the cul de sac. I didn’t need to worry about that as everyone got along fabulously! Here are a few of our highlights and thoughts:

  

Diversity. Puerto Rico is fabulous for people watching as you seem to get all sorts of different people on the streets and beaches given the heavy cruise ship and casino traffic. Stiletto heels and mini-skirts abound!

Amazing food. Somehow each meal was better than the one before. Some of our favorites in and around Old San Juan include: Marmalade, DragonFly, The Parrot Club, Solera, and Buddha Thai.

The beaches. The beaches were gorgeous regardless of if the sun was out or not. When you live in Minnesota and it has been snowing since October, a Puerto Rican beach takes on a touch of heaven.

The mojitos. We made it our mission to sample a mojito at nearly every establishment we visited on our stay. Our favorite mojitos were at the Nono Bar in Old San Juan.

Flirty security agents at the San Juan Airport. Why aren’t the passenger screeners like this back in the States? But then, most everyone down here seemed quite happy and content.

I certainly hope to return to Puerto Rico someday to indulge in the other parts of this beautiful island.

Thoughts From My Window Seat

Why is it that I always feel so calm and at peace with myself and the world when I’m strapped into my seat on an airplane speeding down the runway at take-off? Maybe it is because I’m temporarily not in charge of getting from Point A to Point B. I’m along for the ride.

Now some of my friends and family could not ever really relate to this feeling of elation upon becoming airborne given an innate fear of flying. Any fear I might have is quickly replaced by freedom. Freedom, definitely. That freedom feeling is much strong when flying solo, like tonight. I checked my bag and headed to the security line, feeling a bit naked without three kids and their stuff in tow. I felt like I’ve left something behind. I did. Responsibility for anyone but myself. As a mother of three, this was a rare moment. As much as I love my children and spending time with them, there is nothing quite like going on a pleasure trip with the children in good hands at home.

For some reason, my plane is flying incredibly low tonight. At first, I was half expecting to turn around given our proximity to the earth. But here we remain. Low. I know that we are low because all of the little planes are coming down in altitude from the heavens above my plane to land at the airports below. I can make out street lights, traffic, and the occasional McDonalds golden arches. On this perfectly clear night, never before have the lights of Cedar Rapids, St. Louis, and all of the places in between looked so beautiful. All of the cities and little towns lie glittering below my feet. The bright stars in the sky replace the extinguished city lights as we fly out over the pitch black darkness of the Gulf of Mexico.  Until Tampa Bay and Sanibel Island shimmer in the distance below, spread out like jewels in the inky dark of a March night.

Perhaps flying solo lends a certain calmness to the crazy life of a mother. Maybe The Killers blasting on my iPod helps as well. There is no one but a stranger beside me, and she certainly won’t demand my iPod to watch Toy Story. Regardless, as I gaze out of my window over the wing, I’ve found a reassuring, if temporary, peace.

You Go Google!

I applaud Google for taking a stand against censorship and intellectual property rights in China in light of the recent security breach at Google and 34 other Silicon Valley companies. Censorship by the Chinese government and a cyberattack on the g-mail accounts of human rights activists pushed Google to act. Personally, as an American citizen, I never really thought much about censorship and security on-line when I logged into Google. I had no idea that the Chinese government had placed restrictions on content that could be pulled up on Google’s search engines at its Chinese mainland site:  Google.cn. Now I’m not so naive.

However, that has all changed now as—at the time of this writing—Google is operating freely and without any restriction on content in China. Within minutes of the information firewall imposed by the Chinese government going down, citizens of China were able to download previously hidden information and images on Tibet and the 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre. How long will this freedom of information last in China? Not long I predict. 

In addition to stopping censorship on its search engines, Google is considering pulling out of China completely.  Will Google, and other American companies with Chinese interests, continue to sit back and let Communist China dictate restrictions on how an American company should operate? Doesn’t America stand for Freedom? That should apply to Internet freedom as well. 

I am hoping that change is possible and the lure of revenue will not draw Google back in. Censorship and cyberattacks are just plain wrong. Unfortunately, the Chinese citizens are the losers in this game. If Google stays the course and leaves China, the current free and open Google search engines vanish. If Google backs down and continues to censor information, the Chinese government will gain yet another victory and place further restrictions and limits on Internet searches in mainland China.

Google is blazing a path here. Western companies operating in China have long bent their own morals and rules to accommodate those of Communist China. Google stood up and said “NO!” 

There are some who will say it’s okay to change the operating rules for the Chinese government, and we should just work out some sort of a deal with China. This has undoubtably been going on for a long time already. But is it really possible to negotiate with an unyielding Communist government? Just ask those who witnessed, died in, or survived the 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre, which the Chinese government has continuously attempted to cover up. 

Freedom of information or censorship? Which would you choose?

My Japanese Favorites

Yes, I realize this has nothing to do with surviving suburbia. It falls under escaping suburbia. My recent, and really quite unexpected, travels to Japan over the past few years have yielded a few favorite encounters from a culture I never thought I’d explore and experience. Here is my short list of discoveries:

•  Zen gardens and Shinto shrines in the middle of Tokyo.
•  Old ladies in kimonos with their hair dyed pink, purple, or blue tottering around on their wedges.
•  The heated and musical Japanese toilets.
•  Little bows.
•  Eating the closest duplication of my Grandmother’s homemade raised sugar doughnuts at the New Otani Hotel. How did they get her recipe?
•  Japanese maples dripping leaves into ponds filled with Koi.
•  The beauty and serenity of Kyoto.
•  The crazy music and bells and whistles that play in the subways when the doors of a train are closing.
•  Vending machines selling cans of hot coffee and tea on all of the street corners.
•  Feeling like a blonde goddess in high heels and a bright pink coat as I towered over the masses of Japanese clad in neutral black and khaki.
•  Spotting Mt. Fuji from my hotel window on the morning of my departure from Japan.

Tips For Air Travel with Kids

What do you do when faced with an 11 hour flight to the other side of the world? This is daunting enough for an adult but add a couple of kids into the mix and things get a bit chaotic. Having recently completed such a trip across the Pacific from Minnesota to Japan with my sister and her two small children, I can say that we all survived very well. But advance planning is key!

Here are a few tips I’ve picked up over the years traveling with my kids as well as on my most recent trip with my young niece and nephew:

•  Arrive extra early at the airport. This is especially true in light of the attempted bombing of that Northwest Airlines plane on Christmas Day. Expect longer than usual lines and delays going through security.
•  Find some good (and somewhat healthy) kid food before you board the plane. I’ve found it’s always best to feed the kids before getting on the plane. The kids meals on flights are sometimes nasty and they will usually just pick at an adult meal. If McDonalds is your only choice, do it.
•  Let them run around. Probably a no-brainer bit of advice. Let them ride the escalators, run around a corner of the gate area, climb the stairs. Anything to get that energy out. A quick visit to the restroom is also a good distraction.
•  Bring another change of clothing. Not only in case your luggage gets lost. My kids would end up soiling themselves before we even boarded the plane. Packing  a clean and dry outfit beats sitting in soggy pants all the way to Toronto.
•  Distract them. Once on board and into their seats, pull out something for them to do. Depending on their age of course. To help their ears during take-off: For little ones, suckers or Life-Savers candies work great for take-off. Bottles or nukies for the babies. My rule of thumb is once you are up in the air, distract them until they fall asleep, which they usually will. iPods and portable DVD players are necessary devices, especially for those long international flights.
•  Have extra distractions once those batteries die out. It never fails. 7 or 8 hours into a flight the charge dies on the iPod and computer. No more music or movies. Now what? This happened on my last trip. My niece and I toured the plane many times. We delved into the many snacks that we had brought along. We pulled out the sticker books and as a last resort, we read the same three Sesame Street books continuously for an hour. Elmo never bores a 14-month old! Thank goodness sleep prevailed again and saved me from another hour of Elmo!
•  Bribery. I’m totally guilty of this tactic. If all else fails . . . a special treat once they get onto the ground is always enticing and may even stop the whining and fit-throwing!

I can say we all arrived in Japan with minimal fussing and mess. No complaints, only compliments from our fellow passengers. Good luck on your next journey with your gang!

Stretching out after her flight from Tokyo

Please, Not Dick Clark!!!

I recall sitting around the television with close friends at a rental beach house in Cape May, New Jersey on December 31, 1999 watching the ball drop in Times Square on “Dick Clark’s Rockin New Year’s Eve” special.  We were all quite vocal in wishing the same thing a decade ago—Dick Clark really should pack it in! He looks terrible! Now 10 years later, he’s still at it at the ripe old age of 80. Being 80 doesn’t bother me, but the after-effects of his stroke a few years ago renders him unwatchable for me.

I’ve seen the trailers for tonight’s ABC programming and “Dick Clark’s Rockin New Year’s Eve” is on the docket (With Ryan Seacrest in fine print). I hope that Ryan does the bulk of the show tonight. I don’t think I can stand viewing poor Dick Clark mumble and stutter his way through forced dialogue. He is an all too vivid reminder of my own mortality. It’s time to pass the torch to the image of youth and vitality seen in Ryan Seacrest. Please Dick, step aside this year or I’ll be flipping the channel!